Nobody said it was gonna be easy...so true.Ê Earlier this week i had the urge to purge, purge myself of some backed up emotion. Ive never felt so good, but since then i find myself in a place of unsurety...not even sure if that's a word ::shrugs:: but oh well.

Feeling a bit discouraged, about my progress and what the future has for me ahead.Ê I know im not a mind reader, and i am constantly reminding myself that God is in control, but truthfully speaking, at times its easier say that, and a bit difficult to walk in that faith....but i still DO.

Much has happened this week in every area of my life, relationships, friendships, family, and work.Ê At times, i felt like just shutting down, stepping away from it all and doing something else with my life...but i couldn't for the life of me, think of anything else i would rather be doing, than what i am doing now.

we all have our perspective on what the reality is, but my reality is what im living each day.Ê i just have to take the good with the bad- the crooked with the straights-and keep pushing forward.

so now im pushing harder than before, pushing to find the right vocal coach, right studio, greatÊ writers, producers and vocal arrangers, musicians, agent...team, and still, i know that the team is only as good as its leader, so I am also PUSHING to find the perfect and complete ME.

Its hard, life is a bitch and she never stops nagging, nagging about job-money, love-relationships, "fun"- friends...but all of that stuff will BE there...right now i need to stay pushing forward & up...and much of that involves keeping the "right" people around me & keeping a "tight" relationship with God.

Posted my hot new track "Power" on the site's music page, go check it out!!!

So Its been a min since I last checked in... Wanted to give you an update...

Please forgive me if I haven't been up to date with the weekly blogs... Im in bit of a transition and still trying to work out the kinks with the Internet time allotment/security. (neighbors locked their Internet network) #sucksforme

For those of you who didn't already know. I have been selected as one of "Philly's Sexy Singles" wasn't too sure what it was all about, but very appreciative none the less. Had the photo shoot with the Daily News on Thursday, and it was super cool. The article and such should be out in July! LOOK FOR IT!!!

You can also catch your "Sexy Single" hahaha behind the bar serving up tasty drinks @ the Arts Garage- 15th & Ridge EVERY Monday... Happy Hour Drink Specials that last ALLLLLLLLLLL night...come check your girl out!

Shouts out to the Cast & Crew of Computer Love- We screened the film in Brooklyn last Wednesday and received great reviews, and a pleasant turnout! Love Love Love Mike Pender, Atif Lanier, Nicole Tucker, Cobi, Darrel and Ro---- You guys Rock. Computer Love was accepted in the PhilaFIlm Festival and Martha Vineyards Festival... many more to come...

So much has happened over the course of the week- PROGRESS PROGRESS PROGRESS... but I wanna give a special Shout out to Kandis Greene and Buzzworthy Entertainment.

I had the opportunity to perform at KG's mixtape release party and it was nothing short of a-may-zing!!! To see this beautiful, talented, young lady grow from shy singer to this belting beast is breath taking. I enjoyed performing,the other artist performances were great, and Im so proud of her.... Make Sure you all cop her mixtape- "I AM KANDIS GREENE"

Please Stay Tuned Luvies and always Remember to Thank God along the way... not after the fact!

I refuse to give up! Regardless of what others might feel, say, believe, or do. I refuse to give up. I was listening to a great person and good friend, Tiffany Bacon on Praise 103.9 this past Sunday, and one of the topics discussed was "Knowing What Your Purpose is in Life" It was a great segment and it hit extremely close to home.

This past week, Ive been faced with hard decisions to make, many of which challenged my faith and ability to persevere in my entertainment career. Reaching out for the advice and support of friends, for comfort, shelter, work, etc. They continually offered words of encouragement reminding me that this too shall pass.

When confronted with life altering experiences, I continue to remind myself that there is always someone,somewhere,going through worse. I remember That I hold the power in my hands as long as I hold GOD in my heart, and know that everything happens for a reason.

When I wake up everyday, music is all around me, I'm inspired by the first breath i take, the first object i see, the first sound i hear, the sheets that touch my skin in the morning, I'm inspired, music is me and I am music. That's a relationship that will never die, it's been with me since birth and will be with me until death. I understand the differences between hobbies, dreams, passion, and purpose. MUSIC IS MY PURPOSE. It is what I was put on this earth to do, to create. And there really isn't an "Ultimate Goal" except to continually evolve in it. Let it take me where God sees fit with no time restraints, no rules, no limits.

I can only be who God has made me to be, do what God has called me to do, and Go where Go sees fit. Unfortunately, it is not up to ANYONE else to determine when enough is enough.

Regardless of what life throws me, I KNOW unequivocally without a doubt that I will be okay. As iChoose2live states, life is all about the "Choices" we make, and I choose to believe. I choose to have faith. I choose to persevere. Because I know my purpose. It's much bigger than a dream for me, this is my life, its the very oxygen i breathe.

Unfortunately, in the entertainment business, the road isn't easy or plain to see, and is often filled with "cheerleaders" and "fans" along the way. Those cheerleaders can come in the form of friends and sometimes family. I've realized the distinct difference between a "cheerleader" and a "team mate" and know that at times, cheerleaders may not understand the moves, mindset or plays of the game, and will often disagree. I'm okay with that and still love them the same.

I also understand the importance of having a SOLID team and as long as GOD is at the head of that round table, I have every confidence in the world that I WILL BE OKAY. Please continue to keep me in prayer.

What an amazing week/weekend. I swear you learn so much when u keep our eyes wide open. I had the pleasure of kicking off one of the programs I've been working on for a while now. I taught my first Logic 8/9 Session. Yes, that's right your girl is teaching now. So for all my music Diva's out there who would like to take control of their music careers and music recording sessions...Holler at your girl!

This past weekend I also performed at the Fashion Lab. I had such an incredible experience there. The atmosphere, the people the fashion the entertainment. It was a little reminiscent of the "Black Lily" in terms of style, vibe and so forth. Definitely a place where you need to be if your an artist on the rise ( you literally never know who's gonna show up there) Plus, there' a standard-of perfection which pushes you to bring your A game. GO HARD or GO HOME, but don't half ass @ the Fashion Lab...its not a game. Shouts out to Ron Wilch, Karen Waller- Martin and the incredible crew.

I had a very, very, very productive production meeting last week, that has me on cloud nine- but I'm trying to stay grounded. I'm super excited about this next phase in my music career all I can say is GOD is GOOD!!!! He's sends you what you when you need it and a not a minute before. This next project is going to be incredible. I have a solid direction, I have a partner, and now the facility to make it happen, now its GRIND time (which im no stranger to) and then in due time, the world will see. BTW I'VE LOADED NEW MUSIC ONTO THE MUSIC PAGE SO MAKE SURE YOU CHECK IT OUT, DOWNLOAD, AND COMMENT!!

Last but not least, for those of you who don't know I am an avid book reader...I love reading books and watching sci-fi movies... well I want to share a couple of books with you. "Taming the Mind" - Thubten Chodron and "Your Best Life Now" by author Joel Osteen, are two great books to read. Sometimes I getting a little over whelmed with everything going on in my personal and business life. I call it "NOISE" but reading these two books have really giving me the tools to handle that noise much much better... it also helps you to put everything you do into a positive perspective and encourages you to move forward in your own success... Pick them up and then let me know what you think. I'm sure in no time, we'll both be toasting to love, life & infinite success! Salut!

A couple days ago, I made a decision. I decided that that day would mark the beginning of the rest of my life, and that I will not look back just ahead, with positive thoughts. Focus on being giving of myself, inspiring others. Since that day, Ive seen and experience nothing but greatness. God is good and oh so real.

I performed at a Sweet Sixteen Birthday Party Friday, and it was so much fun. Beautiful, the kids were so exciting to watch. I never had a sweet sixteen party, so that was my first and I must say I was LIVING vicariously through those 16-17 year old, getting it in on the floor. I hope Symphony- The Birthday Girl- enjoyed my performance because I enjoyed performing.

The iChoose2live : The Dream Factory Event was this past Saturday, and I must say it it was Phenomenal. It coordinated well, the location and atmosphere were Amazing. The Video (which I will put up on the site soon) was spectacular and the Live Entertainment was awesome. I am so proud of my friend Shenille Melton. She's is truly blessed and highly favored. This is going to be a BIG summer for her and the rest of the iChoose2live family.

Lastly, My home girl Shani Launched her online boutique: BellaSaniCouture and she had a luxurious launch party @ Raw. The whole experience was nothing short than amazing, it was Magical. about 11-12 beautiful women, no cattiness no negativity,all there to enjoy and share in Shani's moment. Beautiful spirits, I met some new home girls and got re-acquainted with some others. I am sooooo appreciative of those moments and opportunity. If anything it taught me how important it is to have an honest, motivating, beautiful network of friends and family around you. We need to support our black sisters... Trust in God and give him the glory. Pay It Forward and stay young, continue to encourage, and stay positive. Magical things happen to those who do. Besos!

This past week has been eye opening to say the least. Its amazing what a little bit of patience, a pinch of humility and a dash of spontaneity can create...a more in tune, vibrant, empowering, beautiful YOU!

I rock'd out with my homie Akilles @ the RoxBox this past Wednesday, and that experience allowed me to do something i've never done before...SING,SING AND SING SOME MORE...impromptu style, the band backed me up very well, but i had to make a few wonderful changes. Those changes have change my life and set FOREVER!!!!

Truth be told, I never really been a FAN of my own singing voice, but i've discovered my own style,uniqueness and vibe...I have fully Embraced it and now the nurturing begins!! WATCH OUT YA'LL..

I ever realized how much one can be convinced and set on something, style or even a situation,you become so enveloped,so comfortable, so deeply involved to the point where it consumes you, so much so you lose touch of and/or block the other opportunities and experiences out there for you.

You literally fall into a deep sleep where the same dreams play over and over again, and you lose feeling and meaning with each go round. I'm guilty of holding on to moments, tightly, trying to recreate and breathe life back into them well after they've died. I forget that each moment is meant to just be that, a moment.

Eventually, you need to WAKE UP, FREE YOURSELF...remind myself that its okay to let go of the old moments & allow the new ones to come in and take you away!!

So its official I've just launched my new website and I'm super excited.

L E E M E K H A I. C O M launched on Saturday and the enormous amount of love and support I received was overwhelming to say the least. The texts, the phone calls, the emails, the encouraging words and out pour of support really made me feel good on the inside.

Sometimes I doubt myself and potential, but today if anything, the encouraging words from others have helped me to realize that i need to just keeping moving forward doing me, expressing myself RAW and unaffected--Without care of what others will think, say,or feel. Unapologetically and with my whole heart.

If anything people will see the passion,drive and realness of it all and admire that above anything else. At the end of the day "Real" is always respected. "halfass" passes on and the "fake" doesn't stand a chance.

I REALLY, TRULY, THANK MY FRIENDS AND SUPPORTERS, YOU MEAN SO MUCH TO ME...AND I THANK YOU FOR KEEPING IT 100...TO ALL THOSE WITH NEGATIVE SPIRITS, HATEFUL HEARTS, AND ENVIOUS SOULS---THANK YOU TOO!

After month's and month's of recording, photographing, countless trips on the Mega & Bolt bus to NY and meeting with some of the dopest musicians, phogtographer's, and graphic design/web developers, it's finally here!!! My very first professional website!!!!

Welcome errrybody's....SheZaMonStaR is here...in the past i've doubted my talent, beauty, words, and potential in many other areas of my life, but not anymore. I'm here and I'm fReE and I'm ready to share it with the world. Candid & Unscripted... hop on this rollercoaster ride i call life and experience my high's, low's and errything in between.

Strap up & Let's GOOOOOO!!!! ::deuceZ::

On behalf of Lyons' Den Music Group and Alfaphlex Studios, we want to congratulate Lee on launching her first official website. It's well deserved and she's definitely a rising star worthy of the shine.

-Chris Lyons, Juan Garcia

Here, you can find the latest news on Lee Mekhai, watch her amazing performances, enjoy her music and much more! Do not forget to sign up for her newsletter (upper-left corner) to receive the latest news on Lee as well as updates on the site.